Monday, April 25, 2011

Hope Born in Joy

Yesterday we celebrated The Christ Jesus' resurrection. It was a great day to worship our God who loved us so much that He gave us His only Son, to not only give us a model to live by, give us hope, but to Die in order to take on my sin and remove it.
Saturday was a day of contemplation for me. I turned 50 on Friday and even though I see that one day is like the next when it comes to how old I am, I was still in the mode of assessing my life thus far. I won't bore you with the details of those musings, but I can say that God is good in my life.
And then, I began thinking of the day it was. A friend mentioned the day it was, between when we observe Jesus' death and all its implications personally and the day of His resurrection and the joy and hope that it brings.
I have wondered how it was for all these men and women who followed Jesus, heard what he said, believed, then witnessed his death. How much conflict was within each one. Thomas had the guts to express his doubt, but others were having the inner turmoil, I can about guarantee it. We all do, but God does not hold it against us. His love for us transcends our doubts. We all have these struggles, but it is the conclusion we reach; that is what He cares about. We hope in Him and that covers over any doubts that we may have had. I can imagine the joy at seeing Him, hearing the familiar timber of His speech. The reassurance that was theirs can be ours too. I rejoice with them!
The conclusion that I have to come to is that God's love for me is the most extravagant love imaginable and when hope covers over any doubt that may fleetingly exist in my spirit, about any aspect of my life, I remind myself of what was done for me; then conclude that surly my God who had such an umimaginally perfect plan for us all has today covered too.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Are We on Plan B? C?

     Today we moved Dan's grandmother into the convalescent home. She is 93 and has been an active, feisty ball of energy her whole life. I asked Dan if he warned them she would give them hell. He had opted to let them learn that all on their own. You see, he also works there as the support services manager. She will take full advantage I am sure. He may just get a chuckle out of it.
     We never know what will happen tomorrow, do we? I find that to be more true every day. I make plans but maybe I need to post my plans where everyone can note what they are. You can't tell your daughter, um no, it won't work. You getting married this year isn't in the plan because I have budgeted to put new flooring down.
     When I am 93, will I say I have accomplished all my goals, or will family love me and remember how the new floors were put off for a wedding. How the doors were always open to come back into and the multipurpose room became another bedroom and the treadmill was moved into the laundry room.
     My four year old grandson will not stay his snuggly little self so I had better relish the stay-overs that include a bedtime story, or two, and now can you read "Good Night Moon?"
     Our little house is like the great Houdini, and Markus is excited to see Ma and Papa working on his new room. I'm just glad we are handy people, but I am wondering how we will be ready in two short weeks for them to move in. He is bugging his Mom to come over all the time now. I think he hopes that this time he will just be able to stay.
     When I was a little kid I would get mad and say  that I was going to run away from home and go live with Grandma. I would have thought it a dream to live with her all the time. I'm sure that will change and when he gets mad he will have to run away to somewhere else.
      I know God knows everything and has a plan for us, but I wonder if He ever finds Himself scooting over to make room for our plans because He loves us more?  I hope I'm not too much trouble.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Our Revolving House

I love how my kids and spouse have drug animals home over the years, and I say ‘no, it can’t live here’ and then the thing lives here, then they go off and do their own thing and the animal attaches it’s affections on me.

Erin’s cat has taken to talking to me while I ignore it and continue to read and it comes and taps me on the leg with his paw, while I continue to ignore him and he gets up on the coffee table so he can talk to me face to face.
The last one had decided that my lap was the only and best. He is dead now……but I didn’t do it.
This one was sneezing a lot the other day. I wonder if he’s allergic to cats?
Really it wasn’t always  just cats. We have always drug home kids and big people too. Our kitchen table was always the one with ten or so stuffed around it. They all learned the art of perching with their butt cheeks on separate chairs. Some stayed for supper, some stayed longer, but they all got the real me, and returned for the love and laughter. We are told that our table conversations usually take unexpected and unique turns. Their mothers may have wondered where their progeny had acquired skills in the kitchen, but sadly some of their mothers probably never noticed. One gal came to us from the inner city where she had lived and existed her entire life. She was afraid of the relative quiet and cows.
As some of mine have grown and moved out then back in, the house has taken a few turns. One room became the office, the next got tore out along with a closet and a storage room with the plan of a family/multi-purpose/ exercise room. That one came back  before the project was finished, along with his friend. He had to live in the now unfinished space and his friend got an unoccupied bedroom. Number one moved out and the friend stayed, opting for the larger, unfinished space. The spare room became my long dreamed of art studio, and the friend in time moved on. Now number two and her four year old son are coming back, and the youngest, number three, is getting married and will be moving out. We are hurriedly finishing the family room area and once again shifting spaces. The art studio stays, although the four year old thinks that is his room. We will all somehow fit, perhaps with our buns perched on two chairs, and there will be laughter, and love.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Another Beginning

I have tossed around the idea of blogging. I came to this site to learn how you blog. I made an account, but I didn't post anything. Today I was thinking about life. When I was young it seemed as though days and weeks and months dragged on and on but now I get to the end of a week and wonder where it all went. I know these thoughts are quite a normal part of life and especially someone who has lived a significant number of years.

Well, I have lived a significant number of years. My AARP application arrived in the mail a couple of weeks ago. I put it on my desk. It's still there, but I haven't opened it yet. I know what it is. I see it there every time I sit at the desk. It's not as though if I open it my age becomes official, after all; it's not my birthday quite yet. I didn't throw it away either. Maybe it's like a right of passage to get mail from AARP. Perhaps I have officially reached the age where I am considered wise but not to old to do something with it. I have never been afraid to tell my age like some people. I have never lied about how old I am, but here I am at the end of the second paragraph and I still have not said how old I am. On April 22 I will turn 50.

Methuselah lived a total of 969 years, so in comparison I am just a young person. Wisdom from God and the presence of the Holy Spirit in me is said to make a person irresistible, so I pray that I have obtained both in my 50 years.

I know to my grandson, I am right up there in the Superhero status range. The other day he was playing with his fire truck. He asked me if I had any batteries for it because it wasn't working but I didn't. He played a minute more and stopped. In all of the innocent earnest of his four years, he asked me, "Grandma, can you knit me a siren?" I hope he will always be that confident in me.

Every day is a new day, so I have decided that I can start new things any time I want and I will never be too old until this body we are given for our time here on earth wears out. Hopefully on that day I will stand before God and be presented with a new body fresh off His knitting needles.

for today,

--bin